The Half Decent Joke Thread...#2

[MacV2]

A Dude on his bike was riding along a Californian winding gorge side road when suddenly the sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, God said,
'Because you have tried to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.'



The biker pulled over and said,
'Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.'



God replied,
'Your request is materialistic; think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required reaching the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help man kind.'



The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said,



'God, I wish that I , and all men, could understand women; I want to know how she feels inside, what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong, why she snaps and complains when I try to help, and how I can make a woman truly happy.




God replied:
"You want two lanes or four on that bridge?"

[Mav617]

quality

[countrymick]

that could be your best one yet

[Kev L]

For fecks sake don't encourage him!!!
Not a bad effort old fella, did you hear it down the Derby & Joan club?

[Virt]

For fecks sake don't encourage him!!!
Not a bad effort old fella, did you hear it down the Derby & Joan club?

Is that where you told him the joke, after hearing it at your local Bingo game?

[Kev L]

Now, now Virt behave yourself.

[Virt]

Yes sir. Although you won't get to wring my neck in April now, so why should I?

[Kev L]

Because, ahem (in best cockerknee gangster voice) " I will hunt ya darn an gut ya like a fish you slaaaag!!!".
I thank you.

[Virt]

Let's be honest here, matey. You're probably holding the cane right now and there's two possibilities of what you'd do with it. One would make even lloydie cringe, and the other would be a good ol' spanking. You ain't scaring me, I iz from Rugby innit!

[Kev L]

I really doubt there is anything known to mankind or the animal kingdom that would/could make Lloydie cringe!

[Virt]

Click at your own risk.

[Kev L]

He'd even do that without lube!!!!

[Virt]

[lloydie]

I really doubt there is anything known to mankind or the animal kingdom that would/could make Lloydie cringe!

No I'm always game to try stuff :/)

[lloydie]

Click at your own risk.

I'd like it back when you've do with it but please clean it first !