Joke or Social Comment ??

Got any jokes? Add your favourite ones here, for all to share :)
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budd
Posts: 963
Joined: Tue Jun 08, 2010 10:34 pm
Location: West Yorkshire

Joke or Social Comment ??

Post by budd »

CLASSIC VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter.
The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away.
Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter,
so he dies out in the cold.

-THE END-

THE LABOUR PARTY VERSION:

The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed.

The shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands to know why the ant should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate (like him), are cold and starving.

The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper,with cuts to a video of the ant in his comfortable warm home with a table laden with food.

Britons are stunned that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper's allowed to suffer while others have plenty. The Labour Party, Greenpeace and The Grasshopper Council of GB demonstrate in front of the ant's house.
The BBC, interrupting a Jamaican cultural festival special from Notting Hill with breaking news broadcasts them singing "We Shall Overcome".
Sadiq Khan rants in an interview with Trevor McDonald that the ant has gotten rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his "fair share".

In response to polls, the Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer.
The ant's taxes are reassessed, and he is also fined for failingto hire grasshoppers as helpers.

Having revinvested much of his money in his home Ant is unnable to pay both the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, the government repossesses his home.

The ant moves to Spain, and starts a successful wine-exporting company.

A Panorama special later shows the now fat grasshopper finishing up the last of the ant's food, though Spring is still months away, while the council house he is in, which just happens to be the ant's old house, crumbles around him because he hasn't bothered to maintain it.

Inadequate government funding is blamed, Trevor Phillips is appointed
to head a commission of enquiry that will cost £10,000,000.

The grasshopper is soon dead of a drug overdose, the Daily Mirror blames it on the obvious failure of government to address the root causes of despair arising from social inequity.

The abandoned house is taken over by a gang of immigrant spiders, praised by the government for enriching Britain's multicultural diversity, who promptly set up a marijuana plantation and terrorise the community.

-THE END-
I've now gone all European and bought a KTM Superduke GT and Aprilia RSV1000R :D ,
Storm is now gone :cry: .
.
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MacV2
Posts: 17418
Joined: Sun Jan 21, 2007 12:07 pm
Location: Grain

Re: Joke or Social Comment ??

Post by MacV2 »

:lol: :lol:


Frank is well happy with that... Infact he's been telling me recently about his cousins who live in Africa...I'm not liking where this is heading... 8O
Making up since 2007, sometimes it's true...Honest...
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alanfjones1411
Posts: 2789
Joined: Thu May 21, 2015 3:33 pm
Location: watford

Re: Joke or Social Comment ??

Post by alanfjones1411 »

20180330_102220.jpg

I can introduce Frank to some of his cousins if you want.
SO WHEN DOES THIS OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW BETTER KICK IN
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AMCQ46
Posts: 16535
Joined: Mon May 11, 2009 4:54 pm
Location: Worcestershire / Warwickshire border

Re: Joke or Social Comment ??

Post by AMCQ46 »

if only we had some council funded pest control operatives who are not always off sick :lol:
AMcQ
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MacV2
Posts: 17418
Joined: Sun Jan 21, 2007 12:07 pm
Location: Grain

Re: Joke or Social Comment ??

Post by MacV2 »

AMCQ46 wrote: Fri Jan 11, 2019 1:49 pm if only we had some council funded pest control operatives who are not always off sick :lol:

Spiders are not classed as pests... Well to be specific I deal with what are considered to be public health pests...ie those that are considered to either cause damage to goods or property or spread germs that could affect humans or cause bites that may or may not affect humans... So stick that up your web congested funnel... :Tongue1:
Making up since 2007, sometimes it's true...Honest...
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rollingthunderx2
Posts: 506
Joined: Fri Mar 04, 2011 12:12 am
Location: Hawick, scottish borders on A7

Re: Joke or Social Comment ??

Post by rollingthunderx2 »

Tory version
Never pays taxes, blames everything on some other poor wombles, takes away workers rights, loads the system in their own favour, pits the occupants of the country against each other to distract them from the real problem, feeds the populace with total nonsense through the Daily hatemail and express, and actually, some idiot gammon wombles are thick enough to believe them.
Swampy
Posts: 80
Joined: Fri Jan 04, 2019 1:03 am
Location: NZ

Re: Joke or Social Comment ??

Post by Swampy »

Too close to the truth to be funny much
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