VTR1000.ORG

Firstly I would like to point out road rage isn't big or clever, and personally I try to ignore horns or shouts of abuse, I don't have anything to prove or want to get into a willy waving contest with a moron.

However......you do get those odd incidents that don't end in violence and make me chuckle to myself from time to time.

Here's one.

I was coming out of work one summers night, going down the road on my Harley and some bloke in a galaxy had taken the wrong turning, I see him come up the road and pull a U turn in front of me, slam the anchors on and nearly go sideways into him, I tooted my horn and threw my hands up in a WTF gesture, he totally blanks me, no hand up sorry or even to acknowledge what nearly happened. Now I'm pissed.

I pull up beside him at the next set of lights, and gesture him to wind his window down and say to him ' do you realise what you just done? ' he looked at me blankly ' you just pulled a U turn in front of me barely giving me time to stop, I had to slam the brakes on ' he throw his hand him as if to say ' so what ' so I then get even more @ I then said ' I plan to get home alive to my family tonight you prat ' then he spits at my face, I quickly turned my face and avoid the spit. with that I hack up the deepest dankest collection of chest bursting gob and spit it straight back in his face, sadly for him it hits the target and is running down his distorted angry screaming face.

With that he attempts to run me off the road a couple of times chasing me, I'm in hysterics at this point and pull over, so does he, then this big fat piece of sh1t gets out his motor and start running at me, belly swinging from side to side, I then play catch up and pull away, I can hear him screaming and shouting each time he gets close to the bike, he left his car running in the middle of the road, once I get bored I turn round on the bike give him the finger and scream off laughing.

Top man, Nothing worse than being spat at he may think twice before doing it again

Sounds like he got some much needed exercise, he should have thanked you!. I have to laugh at these people who blow off in public and make complete idiots of themselves . cheers.

This is funny, bloke on a push bike

kev64 wrote:This is funny, bloke on a push bike

That's proper funny at the end.

i went to see AP in central London yesterday, cyclist are fooking mad and don't give a crap, weaving and up and down kerbs. they need sorting out.
Down here in the forest they are not allowed to road race, however they have timed bits, marshals and numbers. The marshals just jump out and expect cars to stop and allow 200 bikes go across a crossroads. Basterds. and like the guy says who can't run. No insurance required.

a few years ago comming home from work. traffic all stops at the lights so i filter up to the front. well i tried to. i normally watch the wing mirrors so i know the drivers have at least seen me.
so i gets to near the front and this cockhead sees me in his drivers mirror . he must have had a few yards between his fancy merc and the van in front so he swings the nose of his car over to stop me getting past. . ok thinks me, knob alert. so hes watching me more than the lights. and im giving him the stare so before the lights change i look up at whats still a red light. stick the bike into gear and with a lot of revs go to start.... mr cockhead is so busy watching me he sticks the merc into first and drives of,,, lmfao.. into the back of the van lol... i actually had to pull over because i couldnt see to ride with the tears running outa me lol....he was fecking raging lol

Fabiostar, that did make me smile....

fabiostar wrote:a few years ago comming home from work. traffic all stops at the lights so i filter up to the front. well i tried to. i normally watch the wing mirrors so i know the drivers have at least seen me.
so i gets to near the front and this cockhead sees me in his drivers mirror . he must have had a few yards between his fancy merc and the van in front so he swings the nose of his car over to stop me getting past. . ok thinks me, knob alert. so hes watching me more than the lights. and im giving him the stare so before the lights change i look up at whats still a red light. stick the bike into gear and with a lot of revs go to start.... mr cockhead is so busy watching me he sticks the merc into first and drives of,,, lmfao.. into the back of the van lol... i actually had to pull over because i couldnt see to ride with the tears running outa me lol....he was fecking raging lol

nice one.

You do get some proper Mr angries on the road.

it really did give me a great laugh...

Lovely one Fabio!

I had a bloke throw a fag end out of his car window into my lap, so I threw it back into his, his screams were just like a little girls.

Another one, two cars in front of me at traffic lights. First car stalls and wont start, driver of second car gets out and starts screaming and threatening the driver.
Driver of second car gets out to say something but in completely non threatening way. Driver of second car nearly cr@ps himself leaps into his car and roars off through a now red light, with a camera on it. Flash flash oh dear!

Oh, and my favourite. I am driving along when a car trying to edge into the traffic takes exception to my not letting him out. A while later we are at traffic lights and the driver comes to have a word. I am watching the lights and as he appears shouting at me, the lights change, I blow him a kiss (I am not like that really! ) he looks as though he will vomit, and I roar off into the sunset!

lol.. gotta love them when they get angry

kev64 wrote:This is funny, bloke on a push bike

Fat angry bloke + tarmac+face= me nearly spitting my tea across the bed!

someone showed me a video from the states of a guy driving a pick up who veers into a bikes path. The rider turns round and goes after him and they start having a row, the pick up driver doesn't see another biker turn up who then promptly plants a glasgow kiss complete with crash helmet on him!

The funniest I witnessed was on a ride to Wales one year. In front my mate pulled up alongside a car at a roundabout and for some reason the driver took exception and wound his window down to have a go. I then pulled up behind, followed by the other 6 bikes in our group.
The window went up very quickly and the idiot drove off, nearly hitting other cars on the roundabout.