Kid eh. Who'd have em.

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iggy1966
Posts: 2052
Joined: Mon Jan 06, 2003 9:05 am
Location: Hull (Cottingham)

Kid eh. Who'd have em.

Post by iggy1966 »

A number of Primary Schools were doing a project on "The Sea". Kids were
asked to draw pictures, or write about their experiences. Teachers got
together to compare the results, and put together some of the comments that
were funny, and some that were sad. Here are some of them. The kids were all
aged between 5 and 8 years.

This is a picture of an octopus. It has eight testicles. (Kelly age 6)

Whales are animals, not fish. If they don't get air they can drown,like my
brother did last summer. (David age 7)

Oysters balls are called pearls. (James age 6)

I don't like the sea. It makes me sick on the ferry. (Peter age 6)

My goldfish died. Why? (Katie age 5)

If you are surrounded by sea you are an Island. If you don't have sea all
round you, you are in continent. (Wayne age 7)

I think sharks are ugly and mean, and have big teeth, just like Emily
Richardson. She's not my friend no more. (Kylie age 6)

A dolphin breaths through an arsehole on the top of it's head. (Billy age 8)

My uncle goes out in his boat with pots, and comes back with crabs. (Millie
age 6)

When ships had sails, they used to use the trade winds to cross the ocean.
Sometimes, when the wind didn't blow, the sailors would whistle to make the
wind come. My brother said they would be better off eating beans.(William
age 7)

I like mermaids. They are beautiful, and I like their shiny tails. How do
mermaids get pregnant? (Helen age 6)

I'm not going to write about the sea. My baby brother is always screaming
and being sick, my Dad keeps shouting at my Mum, and my big sister has just
got pregnant, so I can't think what to write. (Amy age 6)

Some fish are dangerous. Jelly fish can sting. Electric eels can give you a
shock. They have to live in caves under the sea where I think they have to
plug themselves into chargers. (Christopher age 7)

My mum has fish nets, but doesn't catch any fish. (Laura age 5)

When you go swimming in the sea, it is very cold, and it makes my willy
small. (Kevin age 6)

When me and Sarah went to the sea side in the summer holidays, we hid in the
sand dunes and watched my big sister doing it with her boyfriend. It was
fun. (Lauren age 7)

A submarine goes under the water like a fish, but it has lots of seamen
inside. (Emma age 5)

When I grow up,I want to be captain of a big ship, and have lots of sailors
(Valerie age 6)

Divers have to be safe when they go under the water. Two divers can't go
down alone, so they have to go down on each other. (Becky age 8)

On holiday my Mum went water ski-ing. She fell off when she was going very
fast. She says she won't do it again because water shot up her fanny. (Julie
age 7)
"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut."
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