It's snow joke...

Got any jokes? Add your favourite ones here, for all to share :)
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MacV2
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It's snow joke...

Post by MacV2 »

So following the advice given out by Dept. of transport & the AA ect.
1/Only travel when absolutely necessary...check.
2/Wear warm clothes, extra layers, hat ,gloves, spare socks & dry boots...check.
3/Carry a blanket, a shovel, some bits of carpet... check.
4/Spare fuel & a good map & a book or magazine...check.
5/Take some food & a hot drink in a flask...check.















I can tell you I felt a right knob on the bus when I popped out for a pint of milk this morning.
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lloydie
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by lloydie »

Lol only you mac :lol:
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VTRDark
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by VTRDark »

Why do you need bits of carpet :lol:

(:-})
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lloydie
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by lloydie »

cybercarl wrote:Why do you need bits of carpet :lol:

(:-})
So he don't sit on pissy seats !!
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MacV2
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by MacV2 »

cybercarl wrote:Why do you need bits of carpet :lol:

(:-})


Pay attention at the back.

Put the bits of carpet in front of wheels, wheels grip on carpet gets you moving if stuck in the snow.
No mention of how big a bit of carpet so I played it safe with 20 mtrs of stair carpet.

Cheaper option is to use cardboard.

Even cheaper is to let air out of tyres.

Even even cheaper is don't get stuck in the first place... :lol: :lol:
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lumpyv
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by lumpyv »

we got these dished out at work.

http://www.autosockdirect.co.uk/?gclid= ... tAodBEQAGw

no excuse for getting stuck now!
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ChrisC
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by ChrisC »

so you're on your own, stuck in the snow,put carpet under driving wheels, get a bit of traction ,move forward, then do you stop to pick up the carpet put it in the boot only to find you are stuck again, or keep moving leaving the carpet behind ? if every motorist does this, by spring there will be enough carpet to cover an area the size of Bedfordshire.....so councils out there stop "F" ing about throwing salt everywhere ,carpet the A roads and we can all get home...What Ho !
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Kev L
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by Kev L »

Brilliant idea mate. Axminster the M1 now!! Tyres might have to be modified to resemble slippers. :lol:
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agentpineapple
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by agentpineapple »

utopia.........
HEY YOU GUYS!!!!!!
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MacV2
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by MacV2 »

ChrisC wrote:so you're on your own, stuck in the snow,put carpet under driving wheels, get a bit of traction ,move forward, then do you stop to pick up the carpet put it in the boot only to find you are stuck again, or keep moving leaving the carpet behind ? if every motorist does this, by spring there will be enough carpet to cover an area the size of Bedfordshire.....so councils out there stop "F" ing about throwing salt everywhere ,carpet the A roads and we can all get home...What Ho !
No just keep driving once your moving & sod the carpet.

Apparently it will work but obviously it does have it's draw backs.

It amazes me how many people get stuck in the first place, revving the nuts off the motor spinning the wheels & not going anywhere.
Higher gear & little if no throttle & let the car pull you forward.
Obviously I'm talking numpty muppet London drivers here with only an inch or two of snow to worry about. This driving tactic probably wouldn't work so well in proper deep snow.

As for loads of bits of carpet littering the roads after the thaw, good Marty can get a nicer bit for his front room.

As for carpeting the whole road network to save on salt...

Stupid idea...the snow would fall on top of it rendering the grip qualities useless. Axminster @ £35 a sq.yard would also probably be more expensive than ashfelt & you have to add the cost of the underlay & the grippers in to the equation. Not forgetting all the nails & tacks the carpet fitters would leave laying around !
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Wicky
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by Wicky »

Famous Axminster Deep Pile Laying tank used to lay a red carpet in France,,,,

Image
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ChrisC
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by ChrisC »

There you are, everybody says the French roads are better, and Wicky's picture proves that carpeting the roads works...only thing is the French road agencies have to spread "shake n vac" in large quantities over the winter months, and the red carpeted roads are littered with dead French celebrities involved in RTA's......Mmmm no bad thing
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MacV2
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by MacV2 »

One good thing to come out of all this...

Snow, the only thing to settle in Britain & not claim benefits. :lol:
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rollingthunderx2
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by rollingthunderx2 »

:lol: :lol: :lol:
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VTRDark
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Re: It's snow joke...

Post by VTRDark »

I heard the other day that to slow down any floods from the thaw then build snowmen. I'm not sure how that works but maybe snowmen take longer to melt.

(:-})
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