An Apology

[leevtr]

I would like to say sorry to the chaps who took an interest in my bike. Both seemed genuinely nice fellas, not the usual tosspot messers you tend to find when advertising stuff. I have decided for now to hold on to the bike, basically my family have talked me out of selling it, as I would regret it, and they've seen how much I've put into it. They are probably right. And many will have thought ' here we go again ' when they saw my post about selling, but I was really down at the time, and still am, but thinking a little clearer. If you can be bothered to read on, here's why.
A week and a half ago I was at work, and recieved a call from my sister, telling me my grandad had taken a turn for the worse, and had been given 24 hrs to live. We weren't all that close tbh, but obviously its still a choker, and I wanted to be there for my mum, so off I went. He didnt pass away that day, as he was a tough old sod, especially for 92, add that to the fact I'd had the same phone call almost 2 years ago, even then He'd been given the last rites.
My dad has been fighting cancer for the last 5 years or so, and this last year has been a tough one. Its hard to see someone go through all that sh1t, but you do what you can. He was in Barts hospital the last 5 weeks, undergoing another lot of Chemotherapy, not as an attempt to cure him, but more to help maybe hold things up a bit and help with pain. This was making him ill all the time, and myself and my sister decided we had to have that difficult conversation, as to think about giving up the current path of treatment and concentrate on quality of life, and getting him out of the hospital. The meeting with his consultant was set up for last monday.
Over the course of last weekend, he went downhill fast, although we still were thinking along the same lines, as it didn't seem to be anything more than what we had seen already, and it was still set up to speak to the docs, and get him out of hospital asap.
On the Sunday at about 3, we got the call that my Grandad had passed away. That afternoon was spent up at the care home he had spent the last 18 months in, with my aunts & uncles, basically in a supporting role.
The day after, I went with my sister to Barts Hospital expecting to be there maybe 2 or 3 hours, get the ball rolling on my dads move to a hospice near home, and maybe a better enviroment for the last month or 2, even 3 possibly. Maybe even well enough to go home after the chemo had got out of his system. We were really expecting this. We didnt leave the hospital till Friday night, where my dad passed away at about 9.45 pm.
I feel like my insides have been torn out. Rode the bike yesterday, basically hoping to clear my head and just not sit around alone with my thoughts, but didnt do me any good. That was when I just wanted to shut the world out and give the bike and everything else up, for that matter.
Next week is gonna be sh1t. I'm sure many here have gone through it al before. Monday 27th is my Grandads funeral....My dads will almost certainly end up within a couple of days, if not the very next.

Anyway, sorry to anyone who made enquiries about the bike, but after sleeping on it I think I'm gonna hang onto it for now.

Cheers

[Jazzscot]

No need to apologise in such circumstances mate.

I hope we can be of help to you anytime you need to off load.


I cant imagine what your going through Lee but we are here to listen mate.

Thoughts are with you and your family.

Jazz

[Virt]

Very sorry to hear all that mate, need any help you know where we all are. I'm sure I'm not the only one willing to listen if necessary.

Thoughts with you and your family

[MacV2]

I'm so sorry to hear of your loss Lee.

To take such shocking news in once is enough for most...

Take a step back from life for a bit, take a bloody deep breath & then think of all the good times you shared with your Father & Grandad.

Remember that we all will be here if you need to chat about things however hard they may be.

Mac.

[lumpyv]

commiserations mate. I hope writing it all down has helped getting it off your chest a bit .

all the best.

[Watty]

Lee my thoughts are with you and your family, bad times mate . I know I'm miles away but if I can help in any way please shout. Oh and glad you're keeping the storm. Take care mate.

[Furrybiker]

Oh man that is crap. Nothing to add to what Mac has said, we are here for you.
I am just round the A406 from you, if you need anything just shout.

[darkember]

Sorry to hear that Lee. Thoughts are with you & your family. Keeping the VTR is wise. Taking it out when things are down is a great way to realize life is worth living.

[mattycoops43]

There are not any words we can say that make it all feel better unfortunately, but like the others said, we're all here for you, thinking of you and wishing you the best mate.

[VTRDark]

' here we go again '

That's what I thought too.

As has been said, condolences mate. You sure are going through the wars at the moment. I know it's difficult but chin up try to keep a head on things for yourself and your family. Have a rant on here if it gets things off your chest. Sometimes it's easier to talk to strangers than ones own family.

(:-})

[lloydie]

Very sorry to hear all that mate, need any help you know where we all are. I'm sure I'm not the only one willing to listen if necessary.

Thoughts with you and your family

+1 sorry to hear it and we are here for you

[adyf]

Jesus everything hitting you all at once,sorry mate life can be cruel ,I lost me man ,made me want to tear the world a new hole,but you've got no choice and have to get on with it ,hope things improve soon for you ,all the forum members are here for you so please let it out.

[sirch345]

I'm also really sorry to hear this Lee.

In time things will get better, it won't be the same as before, but it will be a lot better than it is right now. I'm sure your Dad and your Granddad would want their Son/Grandson to have a good life, one in which you can smile again.

As others have said already, if you need to talk we are here,

Chris.

[Mav617]

Hang tough mate, it's a shitty time now but keep believing. Essex is a good ride from here and I've only spoken to you once but am happy to get down and buy you a pint or four if it would help.

[Jamoi]

Really sorry to hear of your loss Lee. I'm glad you are keeping your Storm, as I was hoping we could take a spin together soon.
Life can be so flipping cruel sometimes.