Mildred was a 93 year-old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband Earl. She decided that she would just kill herself and join him in death. Thinking that it would be best to get it over with quickly, she took out Earl's old Army pistol and made the decision to shoot herself in the heart since it was so badly broken in the first place. Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and burden to someone, she called her doctor's office to inquire as to just exactly where the heart would be. "On a woman," the doctor said, "your heart would be just below your left breast." Later that night, Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gunshot wound to her left knee.
And then again………………………………………
Morning Coffee
She was in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast.
He walked in; She turned and said,
"You've got to make love to me this very moment."
His eyes lit up and he thought, "This is my lucky day."
Not wanting to lose the moment, he embraced her and
then gave it his all; right there on the kitchen table.
Afterwards she said,
"Thanks,"and returned to the stove.
More than a little puzzled, he asked,
"What was that all about?"
She explained,
"The egg timer's broken."
TWO THINGS....
TWO THINGS....
She's my idea of beauty and thats what I ride.
- storminateacup
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