LET'S OFFEND EVERYBODY!!!!
I've just come out of the shop with a meat and potato pie, large
chips, mushy peas & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sat there and
said 'I've not eaten for two days.' I told him 'I wish I had your will
power.'
I took my Biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things
commonly found in cells.
Apparently "Blacks" and "East Europeans" were not the correct answers.
A fat girl served me in McDonald's at lunch time. She said 'sorry
about the wait.' I said 'don't worry fatty, you're bound to lose it
eventually. '
I walked past a black kid sitting at a bus stop as I went into the bank.
When I came out, he looked at me and said 'Any Change?' I said 'Nope,
you're still black'
Snow in the forecast! The TV Weather gal said she was expecting 8
inches tonight.
I thought to myself 'Fat chance with a face like that!'
An Irish boy stands crying at the side of the road. A man asks What is wrong??
The boy says 'Me ma is dead'. 'Oh bejaysus the man says, Do you want
me to call Father O' Riley for you?' The boy replies 'No tanks
mister, sex is the last ting on my mind at the moment'.
Years ago it was suggested that an apple a day kept the doctor away.
But since all the doctors are now Muslim, I've found that a bacon
sandwich works best!
Japanese scientists have now created a camera with such an immense
shutter speed that it is now possible to take a photograph of a woman
with her mouth closed.
I hate all this terrorist business. I used to love the days when you
could look at an unattended bag on a train or bus and think to
yourself "I'm going to take that!"
Can't ride but it don't stop me trying
