Oh what a sleeket horrible beastie
Lurks in yer bellie efter the feastie
As ye sit doon amongest aw yer kin
There starts tae stir an enormous win'
The neeps an the tatties an mushy peas
Start workin like a gentle breeze
But soon the puddin wi' sonsie face
Will hae ye blawin a'ower the place
Nae maiter whit the hell ye dae
A'body's gonnie have tae pay
Even if ye try tae stifle
It's like a bullet oot o' a rifle
Hawd yer elbow tight tae the chair
Tae try and stop the leakin air
Shift yersel frae cheek tae cheek
Pray tae God it disnae reek
But aw yer efforts gan asunder
Oot it comes like a clap o' thunder
Ricochets aroon' the room
Mighty me a sonic boom
God Almighty ,it fairly reeks
Hope I huvnae sh1t ma breeks !!
Tae the bog I'd better scurry,
Whit the hell its no ma worry.
A'body roon aboot me chokin'
Yin or twa were nearly bokin
I"ll feel better for a while
Cannae help but raise a smile
'Wis him' I shout with accusing glower
Alas too late h'es just keeled ower
Ye dirty bugger ,they shout and stare
A didnae feel welcome ony mair
Where e're ye be let wind gang free
Sounds just like the job for me
Whit a fuss at Rabbies party
Ower the sake o' one wee farty.
A translation to English is available on request
