Being British is about driving in a German car to an Irish pub for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry or a Turkish Kebab on the way, to sit on swedish furniture and watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
Oh and ....
Only in Britain - Can a pizza get to your house faster than an Ambulance.
- Do supermarkets make sick people walk all the way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
- Do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a DIET coke.
- Do banks leave both doors open and chain the pens to the counters.
- Do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on the drive and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
- Do we use answering machines to screen calls and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
- Are there disabled parking places in front of a skating rink.
NOT TO MENTION ....
- 3 Brits die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
- 58 Brits are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of screwdrivers.
- 31 Brits have died since 1996 by watering their Christmas tree while the fairy lights were plugged in.
- 19 Brits have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.
- British Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after cracker pulling accidents.
- 101 people since 1999 have had broken parts of plastic toys pulled out of the soles of their feet.
- 18 Brits had serious burns in 2000 trying on a new jumper with a lit cigarette in their mouth.
- A massive 543 Brits were admitted to A&E in the last two years after opening bottles of beer with their teeth.
- 5 Brits were injured last year in accidents involving out of control Scalextric cars.
And finally ....
- In 2000 eight Brits cracked their skull whilst throwing up into the toilet.
BUT IM STILL BRITISH, AND PROUD OF IT !!
